A few days ago, I said that I was tranlating my very first feature length script into English. I am doing this for the Amazon Studios thingy. Checking it out. Right now I am halfway through the tranlation and I thought I might give you guys a preview from what to come.
I wrote the first draft back in 2008. It was my very first feature length script, and I was very satisified with the result. Now that I am translating it, I found a lot of bad things in the dialoge. I have changed that in the English version. There is still one thing that I like to change about it, but I want to know if you guys can find the very same thing.
I'm not telling you more, except the fact that this script starts very slowely. The real action has not been translated yet, so please don't get discuraged if you are on like page 15 and still nothing happened! It will get interesting, even in these 45 pages!
I hope you guys like it! I will deffinately post a link when I finished the complete translation!
BatMotor wrote:Oke ik heb het hele script gelezen (de preview)
Ik vind 't een heel goed verhaal,niet al te ingewikkeld,gewoon duidelijk.
1 punt van kritiek,mwa niet echt kritiek maar een tip zeg maar:Die school scenes zou ik iets inkorten,dat kan te langdradig worden.
Nou dat ik 't in het engels heb gelezen,had ik ook echt het idee dat het een script uit amerika was,ik weet niet precies waarom,maar 't klinkt heel internationaal.
Daarom zou ik de film ook in 't engels doen als ik jullie was.Wel afspelend in NL dat dan weer wel.
Thank you. The scene in the school is part of the thing that I'd like to change (read opening post) no one has actually found my problem in this script.
Hysteria has always been ment as an American production. Producing it in Holland (even when the characters speak English) will ruin the movie. We don't have desserts. Just wait untill you read the rest
Anyway, there have been no talks in producing this script yet. I don't think there will be a production of this script in a long time.
David emerges from the store slowly. He braces himself against a parked car and then keeps on walking in a nightmarish daze.
WE PULL BACK as David blends in with dozens and dozens of ordinary people, walking on an ordinary street, in an ordinary city.