NolanFans Advice/Support Thread

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Cil: you have my permission to die

for me it's less about faking confidence and more about not needlessly putting yourself down. sites like tumblr and reddit are cancer because they constantly reinforce the notion that everyone is awkward and lonely, which will absolutely have an effect on you if that's what you surround yourself with (On the flip side, I honestly can't say enough about surrounding yourself with extroverted people). the best thing you can do is to cut that mentality out of your life. remember that you're in complete control of how you present yourself.

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mchekhov 2: Chek Harder wrote:for me it's less about faking confidence and more about not needlessly putting yourself down.
Ok.
mchekhov 2: Chek Harder wrote:sites like tumblr and reddit are cancer because they constantly reinforce the notion that everyone is awkward and lonely, which will absolutely have an effect on you if that's what you surround yourself with
I've always felt like that. Way before I was using Internet. But I'm comfortable like that. I won't speak unless absolutely necessary. Even then, I'll stick to talk related to work.

Also, I hate tumblr.
mchekhov 2: Chek Harder wrote:(On the flip side, I honestly can't say enough about surrounding yourself with extroverted people).
I'm sorry, I don't get this. Are you saying that you can't say enough positive things or negative things about surrounding oneself with extroverted people because there are so many?
mchekhov 2: Chek Harder wrote:the best thing you can do is to cut that mentality out of your life. remember that you're in complete control of how you present yourself.
I'm trying on that but several failures (academic & economical, some of them are ongoing) set me back by several steps. Also, I'm controlling how I present myself, but I can't control how other people perceive me.

That being said, I'd much better in Cilogy's position.

Pratham wrote:
mchekhov 2: Chek Harder wrote:sites like tumblr and reddit are cancer because they constantly reinforce the notion that everyone is awkward and lonely, which will absolutely have an effect on you if that's what you surround yourself with
I've always felt like that. Way before I was using Internet. But I'm comfortable like that. I won't speak unless absolutely necessary. Even then, I'll stick to talk related to work.

Also, I hate tumblr.
tumblr was just one example. the point being you won't gain confidence in an environment that dwells on people's faults.
mchekhov 2: Chek Harder wrote:(On the flip side, I honestly can't say enough about surrounding yourself with extroverted people).
Pratham wrote:I'm sorry, I don't get this. Are you saying that you can't say enough positive things or negative things about surrounding oneself with extroverted people because there are so many?
positive. again, people are products of their environment. if you associate with extroverted people you can really learn from them and your confidence will naturally develop.
mchekhov 2: Chek Harder wrote:the best thing you can do is to cut that mentality out of your life. remember that you're in complete control of how you present yourself.
Pratham wrote:I'm trying on that but several failures (academic & economical, some of them are ongoing) set me back by several steps. Also, I'm controlling how I present myself, but I can't control how other people perceive me.
people's perception of you is based on the way you present yourself. that being said, when someone is more confident in themselves, they rely less on the validation of others, so what others think becomes less of a concern.

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To be honest, you don't even have to ignore what other people think of you, just take a more positive attitude on yourself because most of the time people aren't actually that judgemental unless you lack basic self-confidence - I judge others based on things like looks, mannerisms and dress sense far less than I judge my own looks, mannerisms and dress sense. Same can probably be said for most people, so if I just have more confidence in myself then that always makes life better.

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You people are so petty and tiny.

:P

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Actually, just listen to the Kanye song 'Can't Tell Me Nothing' 200 times on repeat. Regardless of the materialistic side of the song, it does pump you up a lot.

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It's a psychological fact if you tell yourself bad things constantly, you'll feel shitty, act shitty, and people probably won't like you. If you constantly tell yourself you're awesome and start to believe it, your self-image will be projected on the people around you. The irony is that the less you care about what others think, the more others will probably be drawn to you.


-Vader

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Vader182 wrote:It's a psychological fact if you tell yourself bad things constantly, you'll feel shitty, act shitty, and people probably won't like you. If you constantly tell yourself you're awesome and start to believe it, your self-image will be projected on the people around you. The irony is that the less you care about what others think, the more others will probably be drawn to you.


-Vader
Boom, truth. Hate to use this as an example but I've seen guys who have girlfriends way out of their so called 'league' just for having natural (emphasising natural cos no one likes someone who's fake) confidence. The concept of social 'leagues' only really exists in school anyway.

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christophmac wrote: The concept of social 'leagues' only really exists in school anyway.
NEIN!

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