Bacon wrote:But if she was struggling with her identity throughout the entire relationship, feeling as if the only time she was happy was when she was with me, and she says she wants to find out how to be happy on her own without having to be happy for someone else, that sounded pretty legit. I gave her the benefit of the doubt.

Sandy wrote:

Bacon wrote:But if she was struggling with her identity throughout the entire relationship, feeling as if the only time she was happy was when she was with me, and she says she wants to find out how to be happy on her own without having to be happy for someone else, that sounded pretty legit. I gave her the benefit of the doubt.

I'm late to this party but----

believe peoples actions, not what their words. Especially in romantic relationships. Don't feel bad if you fuck this up, it took me until 30.

BlairCo wrote:Someone wanna challenge my logic here? I wrote this all in less than 10 minutes, so it's simply just spit-balling rather than something constructive, but it's reflective on the person I hope I am becoming. I'm open to constructive, respectful criticism.

You don’t need anybody, but you can want somebody. Don’t confuse a need with a want. Going through heartbreak, I realised that the lines I saw were blurred between what I needed to be doing and what I want to be doing. Life is better with company, but company is need provided with you at birth. You were born with legs, feet, arms, eyes, everything. Unless you have a conjoined twin, you don’t need somebody by your side. You are not entitled to a boyfriend/girlfriend, wife/husband, friends, family, any of that.

But it is privilege. If someone is willing to put in the effort to stick by you regardless of anything, then you better hold on to that if you care about it. I have made that mistake before, and I hope to never make it again, but I have reached the point in my life where no matter how many heartbreaks or disappointments I have put myself through, no matter how many layers deep into sadness I have gone to in reaction to not getting something my way, I am still here. If you can live your life accepting that you don’t need another person to make yours happy, then once you find that right person, you’ll be off-the-charts happy, but only if you accept the possibility it won’t last forever. Life is pretty much like a rollarcoaster of emotions; sometimes you’re high, sometimes you’re low. But unless there’s something wrong with the engineering of the ride, you make it safely to the end. And if anybody is willing to take that seat next to you and you end up enjoying the ride together, it just makes it even more special.

BlairCo wrote:Because it's a possibility; it's not definite and it could happen at anytime. Circumstances change all the time, you make decisions that end up having some kind of affect later. It's obsessive to think you need a partner in life to feel loved. We're not a child, we don't need babysitting.

BlairCo wrote:Someone wanna challenge my logic here? I wrote this all in less than 10 minutes, so it's simply just spit-balling rather than something constructive, but it's reflective on the person I hope I am becoming. I'm open to constructive, respectful criticism.

You don’t need anybody, but you can want somebody. Don’t confuse a need with a want. Going through heartbreak, I realised that the lines I saw were blurred between what I needed to be doing and what I want to be doing. Life is better with company, but company is need provided with you at birth. You were born with legs, feet, arms, eyes, everything. Unless you have a conjoined twin, you don’t need somebody by your side. You are not entitled to a boyfriend/girlfriend, wife/husband, friends, family, any of that.

But it is privilege. If someone is willing to put in the effort to stick by you regardless of anything, then you better hold on to that if you care about it. I have made that mistake before, and I hope to never make it again, but I have reached the point in my life where no matter how many heartbreaks or disappointments I have put myself through, no matter how many layers deep into sadness I have gone to in reaction to not getting something my way, I am still here. If you can live your life accepting that you don’t need another person to make yours happy, then once you find that right person, you’ll be off-the-charts happy, but only if you accept the possibility it won’t last forever. Life is pretty much like a rollarcoaster of emotions; sometimes you’re high, sometimes you’re low. But unless there’s something wrong with the engineering of the ride, you make it safely to the end. And if anybody is willing to take that seat next to you and you end up enjoying the ride together, it just makes it even more special.