Gotham's Soul, a Batman 3 fan fiction

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Joined: August 2009
there are 39 scenes. Here are the 12 first scenes. Excuse the poor translation, but with my poor english, it wasn't an easy task.

Gotham’s Soul – A fan fiction about Batman 3

1. night. We seen arkham asylum’s outside. Guards are watching. In theasylum’s corridors, patients are screaming in their cells. Doctor Jeremiah Arkham walks in front of Jonathan Crane’s cell. He’s chatting whith a well dressed man. It’s Gotham’s new attorney, Edward Nashton. They stop in front of Joker’s cell. The psychotic clown don’t move, as if I couldn’t see them. He draw bats all over his cell.
Attorney to Arkham : « Things are gonna change in this city ».

2. “things are gonna change in this city”. Says Nashton to Mike Engel in “Gotham tonight » Nashton : « - Dent was a great attorney, but what could he do in a city where a lunatic vigilante makes his law ? Batman should be in Arkham, not in our city’s streets.
Engel : - Lot of people think Batman is a hero. I for one I’m proud of a man like him. He saved me from the Joker. He’s the guy who stopped that crazy clown after all.
Nashton : - Don’t Forget you’re talking about a killer. I won’t tolerate any crime un my city, and this man killed at least 5 persons, including two good cops! »

3. « He killed at least 5 persons, including two good copsHe touched your family. He’s a crazy lunatic, and you’re gonna arrest him » Nashton He’s standing in the police station in front of a bunch of swat people . “Ssergent Bullock will be your leader, he’ll be under Commissioner Gordon’s orders. And I’ll be in permanent touch with Commissioner Gordon.”

4. Gordon is standing in front of Harvey Dent’s grave. It’s the night, and nobody is in the cemetery.
Gordon : « - The new attorney doesn’t like you much. Avec With this new anti-Batman Squad, it’ll be more difficult than ever to cover your back. Good new is : I chose This Bullock guy to lead it ‘cause he’s an incompetent.
Batman – I don’t need you to cover my back.
Gordon – Don’t play this trick with me. I know Harvey’s death hurt you. It hurt me too. But we are leading a war against crimeI knew it wouldn’t be easy when I decided to help you. But I also know I need you… and you need me to. »

5. «and you need me to. ». Batman is thinking about what Gordon told him. He’s standing in a shadowy room. There are anti-batman suad men all over the room. Bullock’s gonna launch the attack.

6. Bullock is standing in commissioner’s Loeb office. He’s retrograded because he took bribes. He goes to a lot of bars, drinks a lot, and beat up thugs. One night, he’s patrolling with a young policeman. They arrest a black man who stole a tv. The young policeman beat up the guy to a pul and injuriate him with racists comments. Bullock, furious, knock him outThen he takes the thief to a hospital.
He goes home and sits on a sofa to watch “Gotham tonight”. It’s the same emission we saw in « The Dark Knight” Beginning, with the mayor as a guest. Bullock throw a can on his tv. His phone ring, he has to go where Batman arrested scarecrow. We see him in the crowd when Gordon speaks about Dent’s death, and he seems furious. Then Gordon is speaking to him. Gordon : « - Sergeant, I know your past. You made mistakes, but you have principles. That’s why I decided to give you a second chance. The new attorney wants me to create an anti-batman squad. You’ll lead this squad. »
In his office, there’s also a black man and a young Hispanic woman.
He speaks to her: “ Montoya, you’re a newcomer. You’ll work with Crispus Allen. I read your files and I need people like you. You’ll be under my direct orders »

7. In Wayne Enterprises, Lucius Fox si chatting with a man in a suit.
Fox : « - M. Wayne will never finance a project as dangerous as the one you’re proposing. By The way, I could never work in a society which tramples ethic as well as moral. I regret to announce you we can’t work together Doctor Strange.
Strange : - Your boss doesn’t respect me. I won’t tell me that himself !
Fox – M. Wayne trust me enough to let me take care of this transaction. He would have welcomed you, but he’s kind of busy.
Strange : - Buyers are everywhere. YOU’ll regret it.
Fox : - losts and funds.”

8. Wayne manor is rebuilt. In the cave :
« more on your left Master Wayne » Alfred is giving Bruce advice to put a plasma’s screen on a wall.
Alfred : « - If I can afford , Sir, you can’t let Mr Fox handle your enterprise alone.
Bruce : - He does well.
Alfred : - Mr. Fox is not only your associate, he’s also your friend.
Bruce (with batman’s voice) : I don’t have any friends.
Alfred : - You know Master Wayne, This city needs Batman. But Batman needs Bruce Wayne.
Bruce : - He doesn’t need him anymore. What was left of Bruce Wayne is dead with Rachel. I can’t let my foes hurt me through my loved ones.
Alfred : - By making Bruce Wayne only a mask, you’re gonna lose what makes you different from them.
Bruce : - Bruce Wayne became a mask the day my parents were killed. »
Alfred goes away without saying more.

9. Batman is standing on the roof of a building. He’s watching a man with binoculars. The man meets another guy. The dark knight is listening their meeting with an audio receiver. They’re talking about a gang meeting and give each other the time and the place.
The hero hears a scream. He jumps from rooftops to rooftops and see a woman being attacked by four thugs.
« Now that the police is chasing the Bat, nobody’s gonna save you ».
As nobody answers him, the guy turn backward and sees his friends knicked down. He turns backward again and sees Batman standing in front of him. The thugs tries to stab him. The hero dodges, catch the thug’s wrist, and knock him down.
The woman watches Batman, scared, and runs away.
Police’s sirens are approaching. Policemen find the thugs tied up, Batman isn’t here anymore.

10. In the cave, Batman, with his mask off, is working on his computer.
Alfred : « - Any news from the underworld, sir ?
Bruce : - They talk again about this gang meeting. I have to know more.
Alfred : - Could you please stop using that voice with me, sir ?.
Bruce : - I’m sorry Alfred.
Alfred : - Must I prepare your suit for the Gala sir ?
Bruce : - I don’t have time to go there Alfred.
Alfred : - You thing Bruce Wayne is only a mask, but he could do as much good to this city as Batman. Don’t forget what your fater did.
Bruce : - My father’s sacrifice did not wake this city upI have to be methodic in order to erase evil. The Joker did interfere, but as long as I’ll be here, I’ll fight.
Alfred : - I know, Sir. But you could fight on several fronts. You could do so much more by exiting shadows. Think about it »

11. Gordon is in Mayor Garcia’s office.
Garcia : « - After Dent’s death, vous you’re the only light this city has in troubled times. We can’t accept this vigilante’s presence anymore. Whatever he did, not having a trict policy against him would be a mistake. As for you, I don’t want to see you in the streets again.
Gordon : - I don’t understand.
Garcia : - We can’t take any risk. You can’t die now. You’re an excellent commissioner, your guys respect you, and people trust you. You’ll keep doing a good job in your office.
Gordon : - With all due respect, Sir, I can’t do that.
Garcia : - It’s not negotiable. »

12. Bruce is visiting Fox in Wayne enterprise. He askes him if he finished what he asked him. Fox answers he’s finished, and tells Bruce about a rival enterprise trying to steal all Wayne enterprise’s big contracts. Bruce doesn’t care.

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I'm not posting the whole thing, 'cause if you're not interested in reading the other scenes, it doesn't make sense to me, but would be glad to do so if you like it.

Posts: 120
Joined: August 2009
still no answer... héhé, doesn't look like a success to me^^

Posts: 120
Joined: August 2009
13. it’s the night, and Montoya and Allen are in Allen’s car.
Allen : « - I don’t understand why the Anti-Batman squad didn’t lauch an attack yet!
Montoya : - What are you telling ? Batman is a sign of hope for this city. Before him, nobody took care of poor people. Politicians didn’t care, cops were corrupted… nobody cared. But when Batman began his crusade, things changed. James Gordon could show this city what a true police was at least. Harvey Dent became the district attorney, Gotham’s citizens elected Anthony Garcia for Mayor…. None of that could have been possible without Batman Even I wouldn’t be here without him
Allen : - What do you mean ?
Montoya : - I’m from a poor family, and my brother was in a gangIf my parents have know nit, my father would have had a heart attack. I tried to help him, but we got taken in a street war between his gang and another. We would be dead without batman’s intervention. Then, I realised I wanted to help people too. That’s why I became a policewoman.
Allen : - Listen Montoya, I understand why you’re grateful for, but it’s not enough to legitimize this lunatic’s doings. If we accept a man to run on rooftops with a mask, where are the limits ? ! How can we be sure he’s with us? We saw i twas dangerous with those murders.
Montoya : - That’s bullshit, you know it as well as me !
Allen : - All I know is this masked man terrorizes people and don’t want to tell us who he is. I refuse to let my city in his hands ! We don’t have time to talk anymore, we’re there. »

They stop in front of a building in front of which several police cars are parked. A policeman tells them a young girl was kidnapped. They enter the building only to see the front door of an appartment has been broken. The girl’s parents tell them four men came, attacked them and took their girl. They’re not rich, and nobody asked for a ramson.
Montoya calls Gordon to do a report.
A few minutes later, policemen leave the appartment. Batman enters through a window. He watches carefully everywhere and finds a pocket watch which seems odd in this bedroom. There are pictures of a little blond girl on the walls. Batman uses a little camera and takes pictures of the girl’s pictures and of the room. Then he leaves.


14. The next morning, Gordon is chatting in his office with Montoya and Allen.
Gordon : - Are you sure they are the same thugs than in the other kidnappings ?
Allen :- Without a doubt. Their modus operendi is the same.
Gordon :- They didn’t choose those children randomly. Nobody asked for ramson, families aren’t rich and there are no connections between them. What do those lunatics want ?»
15. In the cave, Bruce examines the watch he found. He compares it to other watches identical. All of a sudden, he finds something. He calls Alfred, but the butler is not there.

16. Alfred is at Lucius Fox home.
Fox : - We have to make sureMr Wayne sudden disinterest in his company won’t make any damages to it.
Alfred :- What do you mean Lucius ?
Fox : - I’m a little worried to say the least. It’s been a few days since a new-comer, who never came to Gotham, has been trying to steal the Wayne enterprise’s big contracts.
Alfred : - Is there a link between those contracts ?
Fox : - I don’t know for now, but if he keeps going, it will be a disaster for us.
Alfred : - Not if we can persuade Mister Wayne to invest in the city’s development. His mission became so important since Mr Dent’s death that he forgets his other life. Still, I’m sure he could do a lot for this city with his mask off.
Fox : - it would bring this city the lights it needs and develop the society the way Thomas wayne dreamed it. I totally agree. We have to think about it. »

Alfred comes back to Wayne Manor and find a letter Bruce left for him :
« Alfred, you weren’t there and I couldn’t wait any longer. I found a link between the kidnapping. They always were blong little girl, with a special gift. Tonight, there’s a circus, and I’m sure they’ll try to kidnapp Gordon’s daughter. Being the commissioner, h’es been invited to honour the circus. His daughter has a photographic memory which is spectacular. I’m going there.»



17. It’s the night, Batman parks the batpod near the circus and hides himself in the shadows. Inside, people are screaming like hell, watching the « Flying Graysons » acrobatics. It consists of a couple doing trapeze acrobatics with their 13 years old son.
After a while, people go out. Batman sees the Gordon and is ready to take action.
He hears screams, but further away He runs there, only to find the Graysons in a blood bath. Four thugs are trying to kidnap the Grayson kid. Batman fight them and beat them. They run away. Gordon comes, and takes care of the kid. The dark Knight uses his batpod and follows the thugs.



18. Car chase in the city between the thugs and Batman. After a while, they arrive to the docks and the thugs rise in a little boat. Batman goes to an hidden bunker. A few times after, the hero rushes in a batboat made by Lucius Fox. He pursues them to an abandoned island

19. There, Batman fins a lush greenery and a big metal gate. Inside, there is a big labyrinth of hedges. There a lot of traps, but the hero manages to exit the labyrinth.
There is a huge table, with a lot of chairs, and a tea service. The little blond girls are tied up on the chairs. They’re all wearing a blue dress and a white apron. Immediatly, he remembers the book his mother used to read him when he was a child. Then, a red hair little man comes, wearing ten hats :
« You’re the one who prevent my friend to take back the march hare. You will have to replace him! »
Thugs come. Batman beats them up, using Keysi. When he turns back, the mad hatter is putting a knife on some girl’s neck. Without hesitation, the hero throws a batarang on the lunatic’s hand and catches him.
The dark knight ties the lunatics and his men up, and interrogates them. The hatter is sure he really is the mad hatter from « Alice in wonderland ». The thugs tell Batman the hatter paid them well, but they didn’t know who was really paying. Batman hears sirens coming and runs away.

20. Bruce and Alfred are watching the news in the manor . It’s said James Gordon arrested the thugs who killed the Grayson parents.
Alfred : - The saddest thing is the circus is this boy’sonly family, but no judge is gonna allow him to stay with the circus. He will end up in an orphanageNobody want to adopt a boy this old.
Bruce stays quiet for a while : - I’m gonna adopt him.
Alfred : - You said you didn’t want to put your loves ones at risk. Is it really the world you want to offer him ?
Bruce : - You’re mistaken Alfred. I know what he’s living. I know how lonely he feels. I could give him what he needs. I could guide him.
Alfred : - Is it a Bat who’s gonna guide this boy, Sir ?
Bruce : - …. No… Bruce Wayne can save this boy. I won’t leave him . Et you’ll be there to help me.
Alfred : - I’m not immortal, Sir. You must be prepared to take care of the boy on your own.
Bruce :- Don’t say that Alfred. You said I could do great things in broad daylight. The time has come.
Alfred : - I know you can do it Sir. But courts will be harder to convince.
Bruce : - I know how to do it. For now, call Gordon, we’re gonna welcome him.

21. Arkham asylum’s ward. Patients are watching tv. The Joker in a straitjacket laughs and scream that Batman saved the boy. He repeats frantically « Batman » several times. He’s taken back in his cell.

22. Bruce and Fox have a meeting with Damon Osito, the business man who tried to steal Wayne enterprise’s contracts.
Osito : - I will be clear, Wayne. Your technological researchs and our armament works could give us the governementals contracts monopoly.
Bruce : - Wayne enterprise is not interested in developing weapons. Our Goal is Gotham city’s development. We want to reduce inegalities, not create inegalities elsewhere.
Fox : - The technological section don’t create weapons, and never will.
Osito : You know Wayne, I really wanted to let you a chance. But you prefer to disrespect me. Don’t make any complaints later.
Fox : - is it a threat Mr. Osito ?
Bruce : - Don’t mind, Mr. Fox. Mr Osito knows where the exit is. (Osito goes away). Lucius, I have something to show you. I have great projects for this city… »
23. It’s the night. Batman is standing on the rooftop of a warehouse. He’s watching a meeting between what’s left of the criminal families. There are no heads. A guard comes. The hero knocks him down, and the guard falls on the window, breaking it. Batman triggers gas he planted in the warehouse earlier. He puts a mask on, with nocturnal lights. He knocks the thugs down one after the other. All of a sudden, a huge silhouette strikes him on the head. The guys approaches and catches the hero. He’s wearing black clothes and a Mexican wrestler mask. He lifts the hero and strikes his back against his knee, before throwing him against a wall.
A violent pain strikes the hero’s back. He’s panicked: is his back broken? But it seems his armour took most of the shock, even if he’s in great pain. He rolls back. The foe put a button on his wrist, and a liquid irrigates pipes to his neck. His muscles grow a lot. He approaches Batman and tells him: “I’m Bane, I’m gonna break you”.

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I stand by what I said, all of the Batman 3 fanfics I have read, suck.

Posts: 120
Joined: August 2009
chee wrote:I stand by what I said, all of the Batman 3 fanfics I have read, suck.
art is difficult but critic is easy. your arguments are laughable. No, they are non existent.

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Posts: 13622
Joined: June 2009
Location: Florida
Leo Ho Tep wrote:
chee wrote:I stand by what I said, all of the Batman 3 fanfics I have read, suck.
art is difficult but critic is easy. your arguments are laughable. No, they are non existent.
Even though this is translated, the wording and sentence structure are terrible. I have no idea who is saying what and who is doing what. It's jumbled and confusing.
You spend a lot of the dialog just recapping what happened in The Dark Knight, you're not forcing anything new. Like this part right here, seems like you copy and pasted it right from TDK:
"Fox : « - M. Wayne will never finance a project as dangerous as the one you’re proposing. By The way, I could never work in a society which tramples ethic as well as moral. I regret to announce you we can’t work together Doctor Strange."

Could this be anymore cliche?
The hero hears a scream. He jumps from rooftops to rooftops and see a woman being attacked by four thugs.
« Now that the police is chasing the Bat, nobody’s gonna save you ».
As nobody answers him, the guy turn backward and sees his friends knicked down. He turns backward again and sees Batman standing in front of him. The thugs tries to stab him. The hero dodges, catch the thug’s wrist, and knock him down.
The woman watches Batman, scared, and runs away.
Lots of unneeded and boring dialog and exchanges about minor characters no one cares about (Allen and Montoya).

Dick Grayson? Please, come on, Robin? Seriously? No, just no. Batboat? Jesus Christ. And you just added Bane, breaking Bruce's back...yea, its complete crap. There is no real plot and no connections between characters. Its dull, stiff and boring.

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here we go: you explain what you don't like. That doesn't bother me. You saw Dick Grayson in my story. Did you see Robin? No.
Of course there parts taken from TDK, it's there to remind what happened, what the characters are still thinking. Lot of people complained about the lack of cliches scenes like the one you're referring to, that's why I thought it was important to put one.

Batboat: a man like bruce not thinking he could have to pursue someone on water? He's prepared for everything.

Anyway, I prefer a post like this one, where you tell why you don't lke, than an insulting one like the previous. Now again, there are 16 scenes left, and a lot of things are gonna happen.

Thaks for your honesty, and thanks for posting your reply.

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Joined: August 2009
yeah, I just Bane.... And Guess who did the same? Nolan and co!

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